How to Maintain Your Business and Self When Life Throws You Lemons

How to Maintain Your Business and Self When Life Throws You Lemons

The following text is a transcript from the live video podcast.

How  are  you?  Well,  I  am  excited  to  be  here  today  because  you  know  what  it  feels  like  a  normal  day.  

But  we’re  going  to  talk  about  that  in  a  second.  

I  want  to  introduce  myself  to  you  because  it  feels  like  I  haven’t  been  here  in  awhile  and  you  may  not  know  me.  My  name  is Tawanna B. Smith  and  I  usually  (before  life  decided  to  throw  me  some  lemons)  I  would come  on  to  this  platform  and  I  would  broadcast.  I  broadcast  about  self –care  and  broadcast  about  travel.  

So  I  am  talking  to  my  people,  my  tribe  across  various  platforms  about traveling  for  selfcare  as  a  mom,  as  a  caregiver,  but  also,  you  know,  building  a  self  care  practice  for  yourself  for  various  reasons.  Whether  it’s  to  support  you  in  your  business,  whether  it’s  to  support  you  in  your  life,  whether  it’s  support  you  in  a  relationship.

That mantra. I’ve been doing it for many many years. That’s what I’ve been doing without really knowing that that’s what I was doing. I was just doing it. You can find me on Mom’s Guide to Travel and

I want to talk to you about how to maintain when life throws you lemons.

Because you know what, it’s the beginning of a new quarter. The first quarter of this year and the last quarter of last year, life definitely threw me a whole basket of lemons.

And those lemons looked a lot like sickness, sickness in my house. So some of you may have, uh, gone through about a sickness yourself, or maybe you have a loved one that’s going through sickness. And you know what, life does not feel all that great, right?

You have a lot of clouded vision or no vision. You have things that are going on with you mentally or physically, whatever it is, and you just don’t know. “How am I going to continue to achieve?” “If not achieve, how am I going to maintain?”

And honestly, it’s really hard. It’s really hard. And I can come on here and give you some lessons, which I’m going to give you from my personal experience. But everybody’s journey is quite different. And until you go through it, you really don’t know what is going to work for you.

Now this was our second time actually going through, um, going through a cancer journey in our household. And so there were a few similarities.

I’m speaking in the past tense because I am praying that this is all in the past. Last week was my husband’s last chemotherapy appointment, God willing. And this week we have scans.

So today is actually the first normal feeling day for me in a while because everyone else is out of the house and everyone is sort of doing their own thing, whether it be in school or be at work and I can actually sit down and a quiet space and do my work without juggling and being distracted. And that was, that’s just the reality.

That’s the reality when you’re a caregiver – it’s very difficult for you to focus just on yourself or just on the things that you need to do. You just have to learn how to juggle or sometimes you just have to put things on hold.

And that was really the case for me, especially when it comes to travel, especially when it comes to group trips and retreats for women. It was just not a reality of something that I could do and I had to cancel a couple of things that I had on the books in terms of my business because I just couldn’t do it.

This is the first normal day in a while and it feels good and I’m going to bask in this day gloriously because you know I have it. All I have is the time right now and I’m not, you know, I don’t know what next week is going to look like. None of us do.

I don’t know what scans are going to say, whatever. We are going to cross that bridge when we get to it.

That’s my philosophy on absolutely everything.

I’m going to deal with that problem when I get to it. I’m going to compartmentalize. And I think it’s what you may have to do when you approach these really big challenges that come into your life, whether it’s just for the week, whether it’s for the quarter, whether it’s for the year.

You know there are 50 million things going on. I am one person, I can’t do 50 million things, so I’m going to compartmentalize. I’m going to do this thing right now. I’m going to do this thing later, and that’s just how I’ve had to rock and roll. (I probably should write a book about this whole experience of being a caregiver.)

So I have not just been caregiving. I’ve actually been doing things in the background in the winter or early winter. I did put on a retreat for caregivers. It was a one day retreat and so now it’s the planning phase for the next one because it’s not something that is a one and done thing.

People are always caregivers. People are always going through some sort of illness, someone’s always getting old, someone always is getting sick, whatever it is.

And I will always be a caregiver because I do have a younger son with autism as well. So, when you are in a place where maybe things are quiet in your life and maybe things feel normal, that’s actually a good time for you to build up a foundation for yourself that’s going to support you when the storm comes or when lemons get thrown at you.

Because it’s just what happens in life to all of us in some way, form, or fashion.

We all get lemons sometimes and we have to decide how we’re going to make our lemonade if we’re going to put a little extra sugar in it or if we’re going to drink it real sour or we’re going to put some honey in it, whatever.

hese are some of the things that I want to say to you as encouragement, as inspiration to you.

And if this doesn’t apply to you, you can share this with someone that you know, who’s going through something. We all know somebody that’s going through something if we’re not going through something ourselves.

I would love for you to share this video out or tag someone on the video. And I also would love to read your comments as well if you have any comments about it. (Only positive comments, positive thoughts. Because I don’t have any room in my life for negativity. Just wanted to let you know that.)

Lesson 1 When Life Throws Lemons: Maintain Perspective

So here’s the first lesson. It doesn’t last forever. It does not last forever.

It might not just be a week or a month. It might be like a few years like leukemia was with my youngest son and autism will probably always be there. Not sure, but you know, or it might be eight months like my son and my husband’s gastric cancer, I don’t know. But you know, it doesn’t last forever.

And even with something like autism, it goes like this. Right? They’re going to be highs and they’re going to be lows. They’re going to be times when you know, whatever. Things are really quiet and they’re going to be times when things are hectic. So the actual thing that you’re going through is not going to last forever.

And you have to stay encouraged to know that it’s not going to last forever and that there’s gonna be some change either way, maybe a way that you don’t like maybe a way that you like, whatever that there is going to be, some changes, things are not going to be static. It’s not going to stay the same. So that’s one of the, uh, one of the ways I want you to be encouraged that it doesn’t last forever.

Lesson 2 When Life Throws Lemons: Maintain Business

The other thing, number two, is if you are someone who considers themselves a high achiever, and by higher achiever, I mean a person who wants to push the boundaries, who has a strong worth ethic, who does not play the victim, who takes responsibility for all of the things that they do, who wants to be in that 1% of achievement in, in different things.

If you’re a high achiever, then this message will resonate with you where you keep pushing. You keep pushing no matter what. You do not give up.

Even in the small things, you just do small little things every single day and you just chip away. Now if you’ve got, you know, chemotherapy appointments or scans, you probably can’t do 20 things on your list for today, but maybe you can do like one little small thing that was on your list and then now you only have 19 things. But you keep pushing and you just don’t give up. And keep a positive mindset as much as possible. Chip away at whatever achievement or goal you have for yourself and your life or in your business. You just keep doing something, just one little small step. It’s still a step forward.

And there were many days where I was like, oh my gosh, I can’t get anything done. And then I would remember my own medicine. “Tawanna do one little thing today.”

I don’t care. Just answer an email at least. You can feel accomplished.

And having a planner by your side is really going to benefit you.

And if you know what your big goal is for the quarter or for the year, and you’ve broken it down into various steps in various strategies, then you can maybe do one little step, one little strategy and get that done. And so that’s really just what I did was like, okay, I know what things I was working on before all of this started and what things I need to continue working on.

You know, even as this journey is going on and those things are still going to be there. “So what are some little things that I can do every single day to keep me moving forward?” And that’s where having accountability partners, it’s super powerful people that you can check in with people to support you, a coach, a mentor, whatever.

And I’m stuttering here because you know, I, I don’t know how you do it without that. So you really need to have those tools and those strategies in place for yourself. So it a little strong, little really small steps as you go along.

Lesson 3 When Life Throws Lemons: Maintain your self

And the number three lesson when life throws lemons your way is about self-care. You have to practice strong self-care habits.

It’s important. I don’t want you to take self-care and put it in this little box of bath bombs and massages. It is deeper than that.

People understand me when I say that. It’s deeper than that.

When we talk about mental health, that is self-care. When we talk about caring for our bodies and physical stuff, whether it’s massages or whether it’s working out or whether whatever it is, that’s self-care, emotional self-care, talking to someone, having a therapist.

Hello, I love therapists – they are awesome. Having a counselor is key. That is emotional, mental, emotional, self-care. And then spiritual self-care, whatever your practice is going to be, whether you’re Christian and you wake up every morning and you read the word, you read the devotionals and you journal about it and you pray or you go to church regularly and commune with other like-minded people or talk to your pastor or whether you’re Buddhist and you chant and you do your meditations. (Although you know you meditate as a Christian as well, you know what I mean.)

Whatever it is for you, whether it’s sound bowl healing, sound, bath healing. Whether it’s lighting incense, candles, spiritual self-care, all of these things are necessary. All of these things are super necessary as well as boundaries.

So there are a lot of different things that self-care encompasses and I don’t think that just doing one is going to do it for you. I think that you need to, you know, as far as dealing with lemons and making lemonade, I think that you need to have a collection of things that you are working on to sustain you through the day, every single day, every day is a challenge.

When you are caregiving, every day is a challenge. When you’re trying to maintain yourself physically, mentally, emotionally in your business, financially, whatever you and you’ve got to have these things that you’re doing to help you some to help support you in that.

And it looks like something different for everyone, right? It’s not going to be the same. What I like in my self-care routines is not going to be what you like in your self-care routines and it just takes self-awareness and a little bit of, you know, it takes some assessment, right?

So I’ve done personal assessments. I do them all the time for myself. I do assessments with clients and I think that you have to do that so that you have an awareness of what works for you, right?

It doesn’t matter if, you know, drinking tea works for me and calms me down and gets me in a mental state that, you know, helps me be productive if he is not your jam. So you know, that is um, there’s a lot to self-care.

And so I think sometimes people minimalize it to think that it is just this like really little, small one thing when it is the foundation of who we are and what makes us who we are and what allows us to be able to function when we are met with challenges.

And you know, we all have different varying degrees of challenges every single day. So for me, having number two, which is the keep pushing and doing little things every day and the number three, the self-care, you know, these are the three lessons I’m wanting to share with you. I’ve got like a bazillion, but I’m just sharing with you three today.

Those couple of things have allowed me to be able to achieve something that was really important for me, which was to get my self-care training together, which I am so excited about.

Listen, you can read a book all you want, you can get training from, you know, whatever coaching program all you want, but there’s nothing like actually going through life and understanding what self-care needs to look like in order for you to remain productive, in order for you to keep your sanity, in order for you to get your mind and your life right. Even in the midst of a storm, in the midst of challenges.

Self-care success suite

I will share more details about the training. It really is fabulous. I’m really proud of it. I’m going to share more information about the training. We have just a couple of more bows to put on that pretty little package. For those who need it, I am just going to speak to you and I’m going to invite you into this awesome, awesome journey and training with me. So that’s what I wanted to talk to you about a little bit.

Today I wanted to share with you some lessons about how you manage when life throws lemons your way.

If you want to reach out to me at any point, anytime you and you don’t want to comment on the videos, you want to send me a private DM, you can send it to me on Instagram or you can send it to me on Twitter. I do see the messages. Or you can just leave a comment here below and I’ll reach back out to you. If you’re really struggling or you’re like, hey, you know what I need to work with you. I’m more than happy to have a conversation with you.

I know that I needed it. I had people that would work with me. So I want to do that for you as well. All right everyone, I will see you next time. Have a wonderful rest of your day.

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Chandra Haines Waters - April 1, 2019


    Tawanna B. Smith Live - April 1, 2019

    Hey Chandra. Thanks for joining!!

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